Thursday 25 August: GCSE results day, the weeks of waiting to find out how well your son or daughter did was over. How did they impact on your family? asks parent Elaine Watt whose daughter received her GCSE results a week after the elder one had her A levels.
Drained, relieved optimistic, sad, hopeful….these may be some of the emotions that you felt as your son or daughter opened the envelope and came to terms with what may have been a disappointing result.
Many of my colleagues and friends agreed the rest of that day was an emotional rollercoaster.
My experience as I observed many young people open their envelopes felt a bit like watching lots of different scenes from different films all at the same time.
I recognised the A* students who were screaming and leaping around for joy.
The friends of the A* students who would have been really happy with their few A’s and B’s but felt a bit overshadowed by their higher performing friends.
The student in tears focused on the one D and completely skimmed past the B’s and C’s that they achieved.
The distraught and angry students who worked so hard only to open the paper and see that they didn’t get the grades that both they and their tutors were sure they would have achieved.
The pressure on young people can feel completely overwhelming and exam results day is an extreme example of what a lot of us experience faced with many of today’s pressures.
How many of you said ‘Look , don’t worry, you know it will be ok,’ or ‘Look when I was you’re age …’ or ‘I know someone who did such and such, when a similar thing happened to them and they are fine now,’ only to be scowled or shouted at? Getting the balance right, knowing what is the right thing to do or say can feel like walking through a minefield.
Maybe the next time we are faced with something like this try and remember that what this person needs is some time to be sad or disappointed and maybe some reassurance that it is alright for them to feel whatever it is that they are feeling at the time.
Knowing and believing that you will love them unconditionally whatever they achieve with their lives, will, in the long term give your son or daughter more self worth than any A*.
To make an appointment for a no fee consultation with Elaine of Focused Counselling call 07919 343407.