Tips for young people and parents on managing exams results

The NSPCC advises parents not to put too much pressure on their children over their exam results.

Figures released by Childline showed a 21% rise in counselling sessions over the last year which were provided specifically for young people who were worried about their grades.

With A level results already out on release, and GCSE results day fast approaching; Relate Gloucestershire and Swindon have offered some tips to both young people and their parents for when, and after, the results come in.

Kimberley Wall, Service Development Manager at Relate Gloucestershire and Swindon said: “Whatever happens don’t criticise. Sometimes a difference in expected outcome can be positive when you look back in years to come because it ended up being a catalyst for a new (sometimes more exciting) path, or it encouraged self-reflection about what the young person really wants to achieve in the future or could even be something that brings a family closer together.

"I think the most important underlying element is to ensure that a child’s grades doesn't become their identity”.

Relate’s tips for young people:

• Be honest. You might feel like bottling up what you’re worried about, but if you’re honest with your friends and family, they might be able to help. It can also be hard for those around you to know how to react unless you tell them what you’re hoping for.

• Don’t despair. If your results are not what you were hoping for, try not to fly off the handle. It’s ok to feel disappointed, and you should give yourself time for that. But try to think about what steps you can take now to improve the situation.

• Talk to someone. Knowledge is power and all that, so if your results aren’t what you wanted, make an effort to talk to an expert about your options. It might be that you can retake, or there might be alternative routes that you can take from here. Find out as much information as you can before rushing a decision.

• Go steady. Celebrating or commiserating, it’s easy to get carried away on results day. Results day can be very emotional, and parties can sometimes get out of hand. Steer clear of drinking too much, and try to think things through before you make rash decisions.

Relate’s tips for parents:

• Talk to your teenager. Try and find out about their expectations so you know what they are hoping for. This can make them feel cared for, and it also helps you know how to react when they open their results.

• Match your expectations with theirs. You might be harbouring hopes for a straight A student, but that might not be what your teenager is hoping for. If they’re happy with their grades, be happy for them. Equally, if they’re disappointed, try to see where they are coming from and offer support.

• Don’t underestimate the effect that exam results can have. Results day can be one of the most important days for young people and it’s important to recognise that. Don’t make out like the results don’t matter, or that the exams were not difficult and don’t hold back on the celebrating if your child is happy!

• Support them. If the grades are not what your teenager was hoping for, give them time to come to terms with it. They might want to talk through their options with you, or they might just want to be alone, but make sure they know that you’re feeling for them, and you’re there to help.

For further information and advise click here.