Page 8 - link magazine

8 swindonlink.com • January 2009
Domestic violence and abuse could be a consequence of the crunch

The number of victims of domestic violence seeking help tends to increase in January each year and agencies fear that the situation will be
worse in 2009 as the pressure of recession bears down on couples.
When people ask for help from agencies such as the Swindon Com- their victim to be believed. One of the best ways for friends and fam-
munity Safety Partnership, they won’t be told what they should do. Lin ily to help is simply to take victims seriously and not doubt their story.
Williams, Domestic Violence Coordinator said anyone seeking help will And abuse is not just about physical assault, says Lin. “It can be
be asked what they want to happen. emotional, with put downs or ridicule, or it can be financial, being kept
“Most people want the relationship but not the violence,” she said. short of money or having to account for every penny.”
“Each victim will want something different but most just want to be Many victims of violence decide at the start of a new year that it is
believed.” time to leave an abusive relationship. They may have endured Christ-
She explained that many male perpetrators of violence appear to be mas for the sake of the children or tensions may have heightened over
charming and likeable to others, which can make it more difficult for the holidays.
Lin Williams’ check list of warning signs of an abusive relationship:
At the start of any relationship Does he or she decide who you does he/she use threats against the victims): 0808 801 0327
we tend to view the other person may be friends with, how you children as a way of controlling RESPECT (for perpetrators of
‘through rose tinted glasses.’ It’s should dress, what you should/ you? Y/N domestic violence/abuse): 0845
human nature to see the positive should not spend money on or try If you have said ‘Yes’ to two or more 122 8609
things and overlook the negative. to control other areas of your life or of the above, then you might be in
When a relationship becomes relationship? Y/N The websites listed below give
abusive it is sometimes possible to Does he/she get jealous when there an abusive relationship and may information about covering your
find it useful to have more informa-
look back at early warning signs, is no reason? Y/N tion about domestic violence and tracks so no one knows you have
which were not, for a variety of Does he/she physically harm you abuse from: visited them:
reasons, apparent or recognised (or others) even if it’s just grabbing www.womensaid.org.uk
early on. or pushing? Y/N 24 Hour National Domestic Vio- www.refuge.org.uk
Women who have experienced lence Helpline: 0808 2000 247 www.mensadviceline.or.uk
this suggest that some of the fol- Do you ‘never know where you are’ MALE (Advice line for men as www.respect.uk.net
lowing may help you to decide as your partner’s mood changes all
whether your relationship is abu- the time? Y/N
sive or not: Have you ever made change to To sell or not to sell - is it the
Are you afraid of someone you live your life e.g. no longer see friends/
with? Y/N relatives, do things in secret, so question you have to consider?
as not to provoke your partner to
Does it feel as if you tip-toe around Trevor Morkham, Mediation Practice Manager, reflects
in order to keep your partner (or anger? Y/N on the new pressures on couples in these recessionary times
other relation) in a good mood? Does your partner involve your In a recent edition of the popular TV property programme, ‘Location,
Y/N children in arguments? For example
Location, Location’, presenter Phil Spencer drew attention to the factors
which he believes are ever-present drivers of the property market and
which he termed ‘The Three D’s’ - Death, Divorce and Debt.
His point was that even
in an economic downturn,
when mortgages are hard to
come by and house prices
DUNCAN are on the slide, there will
still be people either want-
ing or having to sell and
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Vehicles for Hire divorce. Increasingly, we are find- for separating or divorcing couples
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complicating - factor.
Sometimes the sale of the family fragile relationship.
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272 Ermin Street, discount on obtaining another mortgage. pear to be an intolerable situation, at
production
Sometimes, in the short-to-me-
least until longer-term possibilities
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Stratton St. Margaret (Jan only) dium term, the better option may present themselves.
SN3 4LW be for one or the other to remain in If your circumstances sound
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Deciding what to do for the best www.mediationwiltshire.co.uk

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