Going through a divorce is supposed to be one of the top three most stressful life events. Also on the list is the death of a loved one and moving house. Divorce can leave you feeling like your life has imploded, and it can impact many different areas of your life, not just your relationship.
Understanding how divorce will impact your life is one of the best ways to prepare for the upheaval. Being able to anticipate problems before they arise might help you to make smarter decisions as you navigate this new stage in your life. This guide will explore some of the most common ways that a divorce can disrupt your life.
Children
If you have children together, your first priority when you begin the divorce proceedings is to determine how you will minimise disruption for them. You will need to reach an agreement on where the children will spend their time and how you will provide for them. This is often the most difficult part of the divorce, so you should always seek the help of a mediator if you are struggling to reach an agreement.
Ensuring that your children are able to talk about their feelings and understand what is happening is also essential. While children might experience temporary issues as a result of their parent’s divorce, this is typically short-lived and is far better than living in a home with unhappy parents.
Work and career
Your work may well suffer as you are going through a divorce. The best thing to do is be honest with your employer about what is happening in your life and work with them to find a solution. You might choose to take a temporary leave of absence while you deal with your divorce, or you could switch to a flexible working arrangement.
If you want to minimise the impact on your career, make sure you are honest about what you can handle at work. It’s far better to overdeliver on your work promises than to underdeliver.
Mental health
Going through a divorce will bring up a range of emotions, and your mental health might take a beating along the way. To help minimise disruption to your life, we recommend speaking to a professional about how you are feeling. Counselling can help you to process a lot of your feelings and emotions in a positive way so that you are prepared for the upheaval of divorce.
Focusing on eating healthy and staying active is a really simple way to manage your mental health after divorce. Taking up a new hobby might help you to manage some of the stress and keep your mind occupied with something other than your divorce.
Friends and social life
You might find it difficult to navigate your social life after a divorce, particularly if you had a lot of mutual friends. The best way to manage this transition is to stay in contact and don’t cut people out. As long as you don’t ask your friends to choose sides, and avoid trash-talking your ex-spouse, there is no reason you can’t both continue to exist in the same friendship groups.
Learn to recognise the people that show up for you when you need them the most, as these are the ones you should be hanging on to. If any friendships become strained following your divorce, it might be time to reduce contact with that person. Always remember that your friends are not your therapist, and your therapist is not your friend.
Succession planning
Once you start going down the divorce route, you will need to think about what happens to your will. And if you own your own business, succession planning is even more important. You may need to update sections of your will and change power of attorney to someone else.
If you aren’t sure what steps you need to take to protect things like your property, assets and business after your death, speak to a solicitor to determine the next steps. Once your divorce is final, your spouse will no longer be listed in your will unless you choose to leave them in. You might choose to update your will and name your children as the beneficiaries.
