Voices from The Coronavirus - Finding the bless in the stress

Hannah Pakenham is a 24 year old living in Chiseldon. She is on lockdown with her parents and dog, Tigi. Before the lockdown, Hannah was working in Newbury as an Account Manager. She is planning on starting a degree in Media Production in September. Hannah shares how she is maintaining spirits during the lockdown and how she is adjusting to spending a vast proportion of time in the confines of her home. Here is her voice.

5:40am – you don’t need to be up, Hannah, listen to a sleep meditation.

6:30am - ugh okay.

6:35am - yep you definitely need the toilet. And tea.

I’m a light sleeper and an early riser. Birdsong normally stirs me from my sleep. Luckily my body clock won’t need readjusting when we are back to normal. My phone says the US oil price has dipped into its first negative ever. I try not to dwell on the madness of the detail. If I think about it too much it turns into a whirlwind of angst and apprehension. When I feel my heart start to race a bit and my hands fill with adrenaline I yank myself back into the moment and reflect on the fact that although I’m stressed, I’m very blessed.

I’ve been furloughed until the end of May. I’ve got lots of spare time, including a ‘Can-Do’ list for the first time ever. I think ‘To-Do’ is too totalitarian for my Zen space. Week one I ploughed through, but week two I decided to do just one thing each day. I don’t want to run out. I’m determined that 2020 is my year and I’m trying to use this abundance of free time as constructively as I can. For example, I finally finished decorating my bedroom which took nearly a two year break! Hoorah!

I’ve always hated the gym so working out at home to start the day is actually my normal anyway. I’m rewarded with a sense of accomplishment afterwards, and then don’t feel so bad about elevenses or 4pm tea and cake. Or both…

I love cooking and baking. I find it therapeutic, the hands sifting flour. The lack of flour, particularly the now illusive self-raising, has limited me slightly so I’ve been experimenting with different recipes to make sponges rise. My tip of the day: you can achieve similar results using plain flour by separating the egg whites from the yolks, whipping them into stiff peaks to fold in at the end. Overall, great success. We’ve got a well-stocked fridge so I’ve been cooking a lot and we are eating well. I don’t think we’ve eaten the same meal twice yet. Reminding myself again how blessed I am.

I’m grateful to have the countryside around me. I love the sense of community around the village too. People greet each other with the warmth and energy of newly released convicts. While I’m at it I’d like to shout out the Chiseldon Spar shop and their fantastic staff. If you ever need a pineapple, or smoked salmon or halloumi they’ve got your back!

We live opposite a nurse and a physio who both work at GWH. I watch them come and go with such admiration, but also with angst for their safety. They’re doing incredible work so a shout for them too.

Its 9pm now and I’m winding down. I’ll be up in 8 hours anyway, finding bless in the stress all over again.

Swindon Link is calling on its readers to write to us about their experiences for our campaign called 'Voices from The Coronavirus'. The idea is that we can share our experiences underlining that none of us are alone.

We want to hear from you from whatever walk of life you come from to hear how you are dealing with this new reality. Everybody has a story to share from keyworkers to teenagers. It doesn't matter what your writing ability is, the whole point of this is to make sure every voice is heard so that people don't feel that they are battling this alone. We will try to publish your story on our website no matter who you are.

All you have to do is write to us with your experiences to [email protected]. Please make sure that you send a picture of yourself to go with the piece and try and keep it under 500 words. Please also include some basic details about yourself. For more details press here

And for previous entries into our Voices from The Coronavirus series press here